The Legend of Hell

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Before we get to the arrival of the Maiden on earth and when she changes me forever, I would like to share with you, some of the things that I have learned while I lived on earth, before mankind came. I believe that it may serve the purpose of enabling you to rediscover where you live. One thing is sure, I don’t intend to bore you with the millions of years in-between the Big Bang and the birth of your race. The extremely slow evolution, which is so full of meaning, would probably be lost on you. And if it wasn’t, it still wouldn’t help you go through the few seconds that your existence represent, in comparison to what was there before, and what will still be, once you let go of your last breath.  

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Don’t look for me to enlighten you, either, on this particular subject. I don’t know where you go, when you die. However, unlike me, you do not come back to this earth, either as a unique individual or inside the body of somebody else. At least, I have yet to live in the body of a human who had come back, like me, to life on earth.

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But now that I have lived inside Luis, I am much more open to that idea or any other unexpected ones, which I would not have entertained in a million years (literally), before. There are so many forces at play. Bigger than me. At least it is true to say that they possess information that I don’t, and they use it to manipulate me and everything else that exists in this universe. If I could enter the data that they possess into my own essence, I might become even more powerful than they are. Sometimes, what we create becomes much more than what we ever were. But only time can make this possible. A currency that humans simply don’t have. For what is a hundred years (at most)? In the face of the universe, it can’t even compare to a grain of sand on a beach.

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But let’s get back to earth. To the moment when I arrived, as she was spewing lava from her bowels, in flames of red and yellows. That is how humans created the legend of hell. For this was my first home. A place of extreme temperatures, where no one but a Being could ever live or desire to. It was sufficient for them to create the rest of the story, which saw me become the keeper of the souls, that were not deemed recommendable by those who live at a certain moment in time, on this planet. The concept of right or wrong – that is one, humans don’t seem to be able to put a finger on, once and for all. The Jews thought Jesus was a lunatic and a heretic, but then he became worshipped by a large part of the population for thousands of years. These same people, so devoted to their God, killed by the thousands, in his name, in so many wars. They burned people alive during the Inquisition, pretending that their souls were rotten. But if souls existed, it would certainly be the ones of the leaders of the Church, at the time, that would be rotting in the hell that they imagined.

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However, let me reassure you (or disappoint for some): There is no hell. And I am certainly not in charge of keeping their souls burning for eternity. But since I did mention my story of my time on earth, pre-humans, to a few of them at the beginning of History, it became easy to make the association. Which is why I found myself undesired, so often, through the course of history. Enough to remove myself from the equation and never unveiling who I was, after a certain period of time, to other humans. It was easier to do my part, without revealing myself.

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So what is my part? Now that I told you that I am not the Keeper of the Damned, then who am I? You will discover and understand me as you read through this story. That said, I don’t have a particular title, if but for the one of “father to a little less than half of the humans that have ever or will ever live.” But I guess that pales in comparison, when you think about the Maiden who is the mother of all. I certainly don’t want to be recognized as this summarizing title, in the story of humanity. I have come to believe that my part in the story, is to make sure that I keep some kind of equilibrium on earth, between chaos and control. So if you want to associate me as one thing, you can call me the leader of chaos or the defendant of nature. Something along these lines. Though, in truth, it would still be quite reductive.

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To become what I am, I had to live through billions of years. I liked the line in that movie, some years back, as it does remind me of me. It started by “I've seen things you people wouldn't believe,” and it ended with “All those moments will be lost in time...like tears in rain. Time to die.” This character in Blade Runner was man-made. And guess what: Humans gave him even lesser years to live than they have. I imagine that you could call that vengeance. On whom or what, though? You certainly don’t know. And as to what regards me: My knowledge hasn’t been lost in time. At least, not yet.

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I am a defender of liberty. And it is not just because somewhere in my matrix, the lines were written that I would become so. There is a part of freewill in all that is alive. If you decide to move right, you can find yourself living in a cabin in the mountains, raising children freely in nature. But if you had chosen left, you would be caught-up in the city, slaving away trying to get a wage, solely to survive. Both these lives would teach you things. Positive and negative ones. But you would certainly form ideas that you wouldn’t have had, if you had chosen the other course. It is the same for me. If I had chosen another planet than earth, I would be a different “Being” today. I would probably still be an essence instead of living only inside human bodies. And although I would have lived the same amount of time (a little more if you count the time I spend in the void), I would have accumulated a different knowledge that would have turned me into something else.

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But although you can change the future, there is no point looking back. For the decisions you made will never change, and you will have to keep moving forward, or slowly die, in the fantasy world of “what-could-have-been.” That is a very dangerous location. And if you don’t mind me offering my opinion: Never go there, or you will never, ever, come out.

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