in the beginning 3.png

Hatred

It would be a lie to pretend that the Maiden didn’t feel like she belonged to Adam, in the early days. He was the only other human being, and something in her knew that they were meant to be together. But although she understood that it was so, she still longed for something else. I doubt that the “Beings” planned it that way. Maybe they sent her and Adam on earth, knowing it would cause such confusion in me. But in her?

Nowadays, I tend to think that there are other forces at play, in the universe, that are even more all-knowing than the sum of us, Beings. But even they could not predict what happened to the Maiden and me. I still think so, anyway. Our relationship is an error, a glitch in both of our matrix, that was never supposed to happen. It does show, once again, though, that exceptions do exist in nature. And I can confirm that they usually create the most exquisite elements of life, having seen so many of them, through the billions of years I have existed.  

The first days of the Maiden went from extreme wonder to a variety of displeasures. It started not long after she had been born. The sky got dark, as it covered up with clouds. Soon enough, it started to rain. At first, the joy of the water sliding down her naked body was pure amazement to this newborn. She opened her arms, trying to embrace the rain. But she rapidly noticed that her companion, unlike her, was getting nervous. He glanced from left to right, as if searching for something. Within seconds, while she had her eyes closed and her head turned towards the sky to open herself to each and every drop of water splashing on her skin, she felt it again. That displeasure, that had stopped her heart previously and made her lose her breath instantly. However, this time, it was even worse.

Adam had grabbed her wrist and was now pulling her behind him, in the direction of the forest, away from the lake. This is the first time that a tear ever fell on the soil of this earth. And although it would have been difficult for anyone to distinguish it from the drops of rain that were hitting the ground, I did feel the contact of the salty tear, as it rebounded on the harshness of a soil that was still too dry, from a soon to be ending warm summer. The brutality of it wounded me, even though I had never experienced that sensation before. It was my first time, but certainly not my last.

In the moment, I thought that she was the one enabling these new sensations to flow inside my essence. But I came to understand, later on, that they were actually caused by the male, Adam. For it is him that forced the Maiden to shift into fear and anxiety. She had absolutely no other reason to feel that way. One second, she was bathing in ecstasy as the rain covered her and the next, she was afraid to get hurt; a sensation that was already inscribed inside her.

It became clear to me, later on: It was his action that imposed this very powerful effect on me. I did not know it then, but what was slowly developing in me was something that I would try to fight away for the rest of my life. It is called hatred.

Sadly enough, many of the first values that have become part of me, were in response to Adam’s actions, words and gestures. It continued through time, through his descendants. Before this man came to life, earth was free. Chaos was enabling life to flower and grow without limits. Everything that happened was natural and meant to be. But it wasn’t so with Adam. He felt the need to control everything.

Everything and everyone… including The Maiden.

I should have known, right from the start, that I was not about to let him. I could have used the powers I still possessed then, in order to change the course of history on earth. Would they have come for me this time (the Beings)? Would they have tried to punish me for ruining their little experiment? I greatly doubt that. They would have tried something else, somewhere else, until they felt satisfied that their creation would help them to instill control into the universe. But they would have let me be.

Instead, I just stood there and watched. As I said before: No one can change its true nature – not even me. I believe in chaos, and so I let things unfold, deciding that this event was part of it. But it was not. It is plain to see now, as I look back. His presence is not due to nature, but because the Beings acted as gods and added an external element that was never meant to exist on this planet.

The problem was that I was blinded by the fascination that the Maiden had on me, from the moment our paths crossed. I was so curious to try to understand her essence, that I forgot his. I thought that fully knowing her would probably explain him at the same time. How wrong I was. Those of you that pretend that men and women are identical have no idea what of the truth. They are equal, for sure, but completely different in their way of thinking, as much as in regards to their body structure. Their matrix is built to complete each other – not to assimilate into one another. It is true that evolution has changed some of them, though. In this day and age, you find all kind of human beings on the scale between a male and female. Yet, in the end, individual of both sexes are still quite different from one another. That is just a simple fact. Trying to change nature, is never a good solution. Even with the best of intentions, which I am sure the Beings had when they created Adam. Ans look what they have done…

TO BE CONTINUED