To be Unique and Yet One with All
To be unique. This is something we all want to believe that we are. You, me, and the rest of the Beings as well. Without the conviction that we are separate, peculiar, an individual different from all others, would we even exist, or would we simply blend into the hive, losing our consciousness?
Yet, as much as there are elements that show that we do exist separately, the logic proves that we are all but one. And although the rest of my family and I were born in the instant that the universe came to life, we still made the mistake to believe that we were not one and the same. We had different views on just about anything back then, and we still do. That was enough to trick us into affirming that we were many. In truth, we are but the separation of one. In fact, when one dies, it goes back into the whole, until the whole separates again, into something unique.
To be unique and yet one with all: This is what we all must come to understand. It would shatter our arrogance into pieces, and make us feel much closer to others. We could empathize with everyone, instead of trying to conquer them. But then, if the Beings themselves don’t want to accept that, how could we ask you to? And yes, that includes me. I have no intention of letting go of my ego. Not before the final moment, when I will finally melt with the all, once again.
These days, I feel it may happen as soon as Luis, my host, lets go of his last breath. And although we don’t communicate anymore (I have no intention of sharing my knowledge with the person that will be replacing me, even if that is not his choice), I do hope that he lasts long enough for me to discover a few things that may save me from annihilation.
I don’t want you to think that I despise Luis. On the contrary, he is certainly the host that made me question myself the most. And there is nothing I adore more than having to review my positions, on any subject. But it his partly his fault if my Maiden has left me behind. For all his capacity to convince, and his ability to offer a better world to those that he loves, he can also create a hellish environment, when he doesn’t want to accept the refusal of others of what he calls “evidences of life.” And as right as he is, the end results always goes against him. So, what is the point to be right if you lose the only thing that matters to you?
There goes that “ego” element again. If Luis could have risen his empathy level, I would most probably be enjoying divinity, by my Maiden’s side, instead of writing these memoirs. But no! He had to put his foot down, and state his disagreement, time and time again, until there was no one left to disagree with. His loss was great, mine was greater. And so, it fully justifies my silence, which I shall never break until I face the emptiness that will come, sooner or later, again.
Back to my birth. The first time that I felt that I was, came when one of the other Beings engaged with me. It was not a voice, as we have none. But for you to understand how we communicate, and what is shared between us, I will write as if we were indeed talking and listening to one another. Just to make it simpler.
His address towards me made me comprehend that I existed and that I needed to act in order to be. Therefore, it is interaction that made me exist, not the thinking, which I was already doing before hearing his voice calling to me, from outside. As humans ask: If a tree falls in the forest but no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound? The answer, is yes, it does: Because to everything else that exists, it makes them understand that they are, indeed, alive. And so, it was time for me to act, or to be precise, to react.
In a short amount of time, which probably represents hundreds of years on earth, we were all gathered and trying to figure out who we were and what we were supposed to do. Not once, in that moment, did we ever mention the hypothesis that we were all just one consciousness, and part of everything else that surrounded us.
To me, this is now obvious. We came to life as the Big Bang (as you called it) happened. And so, how can we be anything else that only particles of the whole? But the knowledge that had been inserted in us, was pointing us in other directions. It wanted us to believe that we were unique, and so we did.
What was the goal of such deception? To question I guess (yes, I still don’t have an answer to this, myself). Because in the end, it is the only way to grow. And for the universe to get better, we had to find solutions that did not exist inside each of us yet. Questioning one another, and each adding our own thoughts, made us come up with answers that, I believe, our own creators were looking for and could not find by themselves. Sometimes (not to say often), I think that this is all we are meant to do, us Beings: Find answers for our own Gods. And I suppose, they do just the same for theirs…